An Interview with Obsequious Melon

Artemis360:

Today we’re very lucky to have Obsequious Melon here who has kindly agreed to let us interview him on the ups and downs, the highs and the lows of his experience in the 40k hobby. So, the first question is when you decide to start a new army, what are some of the biggest factors in making you choose any given race?

Obsequious Melon:

Cool miniatures that really fire my imagination are key. After that it’s all about the fluff. If I can relate in some way to the characters being presented then GW has me by the balls and my wallet tends to empty like a dick in a tight pussy.

Artemis360:

Ok, So next question. How do you feel about the evolution (or devolution) of codices in the last few years?

Obsequious Melon:

In what way? Power creep or design?

Artemis360:

Both

Obsequious Melon:

It seems as though it has been very imperial focused in recent years. Until very recently it just felt like power armour after power armour codex was being released. Things have improved recently. I mean I don’t mind power creep really. As long as it isn’t crazy leaps each time. But I tend to play evil armies so because it seemed like it was all imperial armies being released I felt a little jaded with the whole hobby until we started running the league.  I think the last few codices from space wolves and blood angels on have been the best they have ever done. What irritates me is people’s responses to the codices. They just build the most broken combination and then moan when no one will play them. People who aren’t interested in the role playing element.

Artemis360:

So you feel WAAC play is detrimental to the hobby?

Obsequious Melon:

It is detrimental to my enjoyment of the hobby.

Artemis360:

what's your opinion on 6th ed?

Obsequious Melon:

If I was running a company like GW I would look to evolving the rules so that after 4 or 5 iterations we would have a well tested set of rules that were set (pretty much) in stone. Chess hasn’t had a change of rules in centuries and it still seems very popular! I understand that changing rules means you shift lots of expensive books and you shift the needs of the players and so they have to buy more models in order to be competitive. I fully understand the commercial logic behind that but that leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I fully expect vehicles to be nerfed so that we all have to buy more troops.

Artemis360:

But what’s your wish list for 6th? What would gladly say goodbye to from 5th and welcome seeing in 6th?

Obsequious Melon:

I would say goodbye to TLOS but actually I want them to make very small changes. Just tweak things. Like I said before so that they can move towards evolving a set of rules that don’t need changing every four years.

Artemis360:

ok, so no defensive weapons bumping back up to strength 5 or anything like that? Assaulting after deepstrike or something

Obsequious Melon:

No, I think the game plays well at the moment and any big rules changes they make will simply be for the sake of making changes rather than the game actually needing it.

Artemis360:

Describe for you the perfect game of 40k.

Obsequious Melon:

Two mates having a battle with a bit of banter between the two, maybe go for a beer afterwards and laugh about the stupid shit we tried to do. Chatting about the moment when you said fuck it, the last guardsman in that unit is going to charge the full unit of bloodletters and managed to take four of them with him. I don’t ever play to win, I play because I like hanging out with my opponent, If I don't like the person I won’t play them.

Artemis360:

So nothing involving Charisma Carpenter pinning your arms to the floor with her stiletto heels and peeing on you.

Obsequious Melon:

God no water sports are for the seriously weird.

Artemis360:

what’s your opinion on wargaming in Hong Kong in comparison to the UK?

Obsequious Melon:

There is a lot more WAAC players who are genuinely incapable of writing a fun list. You get WAAC players in England too but everyone I've ever met has been able to scribble down an ogryn themed army as a one off battle for a laugh.  Most Hong Kong players don’t seem to be able to do that.